Wake up, wake up, it’s time to start the day, come down to breakfast, don’t play around now, put that book down, get downstairs, make sure you get your socks, put your shoes on, you should tie your laces so you don’t trip over them, where are your shoes? I have no idea where they are, did you leave them outside? You probably left them outside, go look, they’re all wet? Well, you’ll still have to wear them, pack up your backpack, we’re leaving in ten minutes, pack up your backpack, we’re leaving in five minutes, get your backpack, one more minute, well, looks like you’re walking yourself to school, because your brothers and I are leaving, remember, if you’re late to school that means you don’t get technology time when you get home, come on, boys, stay out of the street, stay by me, on the grass, make sue you don’t get your shoes too terribly wet, watch out for that sprinkler, oh, watch out for the dog poop, please don’t step in the dog poop, welp, now we’re going to have to clean your shoes off, come over here, wait boys, we have to clean the poop off so your brother doesn’t track it inside the school, don’t cross the street yet, you need to wait for me, there are cars coming, okay, ready, set, go! You’re getting too far ahead, wait up for us, watch where you’re going, share the sidewalk, don’t stop when you’re walking right in front of me, hurry up, we can’t be late for school, hold the door, please, wait for me, let’s be quiet through the hallways, don’t stand on the bench, let’s walk your brothers to their classes, I love you, remember who you are, strong, kind, courageous and mostly Son, have a wonderful day, okay, come on, boys, let’s go back home, are you cold? Let’s fix your jacket, hold the door open, please, slow down, boys, stop before you get to the street, do not cross without me, I’m coming as fast as I can, this stroller isn’t a running one, wait a minute, let me get a picture of you with that flower, okay, let’s cross, one more street, we can do it, I know you’re tired, I know it’s cold, yay we’re home, what do you want to play with? Please stay out of that, stay out of that, please stay out of that, for the love, please leave things alone, just leave it alone, you know what you can play with and what you should stay out of, okay, thank God, it’s story time, go pick some stories, let’s read, time for lights out, better stay in your beds, I’ll be right here, [go to work], someone’s knocking, it’s time for dinner, walking down the stairs is not a race, I’m coming, I’m coming, everybody’s here, let’s pray, what was the best part of your day, everybody listen, your brother’s trying to talk, be quiet, hey, your brother is trying to talk, and it’s not polite to interrupt, this is a really great dinner, how could you possibly still be hungry, you’ve had three plates, make sure you eat all your vegetables, they’re good for you, don’t eat too much, though, your tummy will hurt, but make sure you eat enough, because your tummy will hurt, don’t put your elbows on the table, keep your voices down, please, wait, guys, wait, where did you go, it’s time for after-dinner chores, don’t hit your brother, make sure you put your shoes where they belong, don’t go out front without a parent watching, how many times do I have to tell you, doesn’t matter if you’re a big boy, you have no idea how to stay alive like I do, hey, don’t hurt your brother just because you’re angry, remember, we don’t hurt people in our anger, we use our words to express how we feel, time for chores, time for baths, time to get out, I said put the toys down and get out of the bath, drain the water, let’s read some stories, everybody be quiet, I can’t read over your voices and I really don’t like to try, be quiet, hey guys, be quiet, please get off me, I don’t mind you sitting n my lap, but not when you’re wrestling, okay silent reading time, I said silent reading time, does anybody know what silent means? Apparently I’m the only one, you know what, everybody just brush your teeth and get in bed, I said it’s time for bed, get back in your bed, get.back.in.your.bed., GET BACK IN YOUR BED, get back in your bed get back in your bed get back in your bed…
Husband: Want to—?
Me: Nope.
