Boyhood, Peter Pan and Frozen Moments
If I had a dime every time I heard someone say something like, “Time flies. Cherish these days.” I’d be a millionaire. Or how ‘bout, “Time flies. You’re going to blink, and she’s going to be graduating from high school.” Many of us have heard the empty nester at the grocery store passionately declare, “It goes by all too fast. I remember when my little girl was her age.” Then there’s the stay-at-home parent line, “The days are long, but the years are short” (Okay, I’ve just been informed that’s from Grethen Rubin.).
Yes, it’s all pretty cliché, and still, it’s the truth!
However, some days it is really difficult not wanting your child to grow up.
Recently, when my 2 year old daughter, Caroline, jumped on the Frozen bandwagon (she’s only seen the movie once), it was pretty darn cute, and well, you know where I’m going with this…
Even though she’s the most precious ‘lil girl in the entire world, this just gets old…
Let it go. Let it go. Don’t’ hold it back anymore…
Let it go. Let it go. Don’t’ hold it back anymore…
(Repeat – Repeat – Repeat – Repeat – etc. …)
I think I’ve read Peter Pan 4 times already today. It’s only 2:08 p.m. I’m going to set a new record before 8 p.m. I’d like to throw Tinkerbell against the wall, but my nonviolent convictions remind me to breathe deeply, smile, and remember that every adult battles the “Captain Hook” syndrome.
Do you want to build a snowman?
May I say, “NO!” please?
Everyone looks forward to the day their 2-year-old learns how to use the toilet. The parents with the 10-month-old are on pins and needles anticipating baby’s first steps. So many parents are thrilled the day their child stops sucking his or her thumb, throws away the lovy, and/ or drops the afternoon nap (so you don’t have to be at home from 1:30 p.m. – 3:30 p.m. every single afternoon).
We are pumped for milestones, and this posture of living doesn’t seem to stop until the nest is, yet again, empty. Think about it. We—westerners—are all about what’s next, and we cannot wait for the next big thing in life, whether this applies to children’s development, career moves, vacations, “wins” at work, etc.
More often than not, we think the answer to life is summed up in the phrase, “Carpe Diem”—Seize The Day—but, while motivational at times, this timeless phrase is actually misleading and not very conducive to the seasons of ordinary life. “Carpe Diem” lifestyles seem to get in the way of real life and are rooted in the desire to achieve the next greatest milestone! The “Carpe Diem” world ironically misses out on cleaning diapers and listening to the Frozen soundtrack on repeat.
Most of the time, we—adults—learn lessons in hindsight. If we open up our Photo Stream at night and spend an hour looking at iPhone videos of our baby growing up, we usually get pretty emotional, to say the least. We end up sounding like the old lady at the grocery store inwardly reminding ourselves that life is too short. We want to do the impossible and freeze time. We see sacred moments that are somewhat long forgotten.
Have you seen Richard Linklater’s Academy Award-nominated gem, Boyhood? You will either love it or hate it, but everyone should learn to respect this original masterpiece of patient filmmaking. The story chronicles the life of a child and his family for 12 years until the boy goes off to college. Linklater aims to achieve presenting every-day events and the ups and downs of ordinary life for approximately 10 minutes of footage per year. Crazy! People love and hate Boyhood for the same reasons. The film doesn’t have a major plot with the typical film storyline and the three-part act. It is simply a movie about one’s life, the discovery of oneself through family drama, peer pressure, hobbies, pimples, haircuts and awkward relationships. Linklater manages to get the point across that life is not so much about “seizing the day,” but allowing the moments to seize you!
If parents are always looking for the “next big thing” this will only lead to disappointment and a glamorized “Carpe Diem,” epic fail! But if we allow the moments to seize us, we will be more willing to “let it go” and sing along for the 1,000th time with Elsa, Anna and Olaf! We might enjoy Peter Pan and the Lost Boys of Neverland and be more willing to give Captain Hook the boot!
Your child will get older. There will be a day when Peter Pan will only be known for Peanut Butter. Your child will no longer play with pixie dust, and Olaf—like seasons—will become a “happy snowman” puddle. Moments seize us 24/7 from the cradle to the grave.
The only tools we need are eyes to see, ears to hear, and a heart like a child. May the moments seize you, and may you learn to fly with time.
