Today is a day we celebrate a great man of history who envisioned a lofty dream for America, one of peace and love and equality, spread to every corner of the world. While I love the legacy of Martin Luther King Jr. I have to admit that I’d forgotten it was a holiday until I woke up at 4 in the morning and couldn’t get back to sleep, so I thought I’d check my email and then happened to read the note from my kids’ principal reminding me that school was out for the day. Yay! My favorite.
I lay in bed, trying desperately to get back to sleep, while Husband clearly didn’t have any trouble ignoring my insomnia, judging by the noises coming from his mouth and nose. So, naturally, I started thinking about my own dreams. I ran through them, writing dreams, book dreams, music dreams, dreams for my kids, dreams for Husband, and when I’d listed them all in my much-too-busy-for-4-a.m.-head, I thought about the one I want most right now. It’s a little sad and simple, but it’s a big one all the same: Get a decent nights’ sleep for once.
You might say I’ll probably never have a decent nights’ sleep, because I have six kids, and kids become teenagers and teenagers become adults and I’ll never stop worrying about them until the day I die. Okay. That’s fair. But let me just explain here that it’s not often that worry or anxiety, thankfully, keeps me up at night. Usually because I’m so exhausted by the time I get to fall into bed that sleep comes easily. That old saying “asleep before your head hit the pillow?” That’s me.
Also, our kids have always been champion sleepers, ever since they were tiny babies. It was unusual for a Toalson baby not to sleep all the way through the night by, at the latest, eight weeks of age. It’s rare that any of the boys will wake in the middle of the night with nightmares or feeling sick, although it does happen on occasion. Besides, I’m not even talking about that kind of decent nights’ sleep. Because the truth is, those are more the exception than the rule, and of course I’m going to rub a boy’s back when he’s not feeling well, and of course I’m going to make sure they feel safe until they fall asleep, and of course I’ll hold that baby if his gums are hurting too much.
I’m talking about the nights I’m woken up for no other reason than the fact that I sleep with a lawnmower.
I can’t even count the number of times I’ve woken in the middle of the night and thought one of the neighbors had mistakenly set their yard guy as their alarm clock and then, when reason climbed back to its rightful place and I looked over at Husband, I saw the culprit.
There are nights when Husband will roll over and put his arm around me, and it’s one of my favorite things to momentarily wake up and feel his warmth. But woe to me if I don’t find sleep before he starts revving his motor, because I will have no hope of finding it for the rest of the night. Sometimes he’ll turn over on his stomach, which he says is better for the snoring thing, but I’d like to report that no, it’s not. It muffles the sound just a tad, but it definitely does not eliminate it.
That is one magnificent yard he’s mowing.
So, as we remember the contribution to history that Martin Luther King Jr. made, I’d like to ask the powers that be, to please, please, solve this snoring problem, because I did not sign up for a John Deere tractor chime on my alarm.
And then, just before pushing Husband onto his belly, I remembered that I’d recorded last night’s one-man performance, because Husband didn’t believe he could possibly be snoring as badly as he is. I stuck a headphone in my ear and played the recording. I was surprised to find that there were two lawn mowers in our room last night. I have no idea who the other one was.
I was too afraid to investigate. Instead, I just rolled over and went back to sleep.
