Husband: Does Mama know what you do at all times?
3-year-old: No.
Husband: Yes. Mama always knows. Mama knows everything and sees everything.
5-year-old: If we tell someone a secret, will Mama hear it?
Husband:
5-year-old:
Husband: Yes.
Me: Before you go outside to play, you have to clean your room.
8-year-old: I don’t have to. You just want me to.
Me: It’s a mess. I’d say you have to clean it now, because it’s a national disaster in there.
8-year-old: I’m a writer, a film maker and an inventor. I am not a room cleaner.
Me:
8-year-old:
Me: I can’t think of anything to say.
3-year-old: Are we having berries for lunch, Mama?
Me: Yes. We’re having strawberries for lunch.
3-year-old: But are we having berries, Mama?
Me: I just said yes. We’re having strawberries. Strawberries are berries.
3-year-old: NO! THEY’RE STRAWBERRIES!
Me:
5-year-old: (just got back from his brother’s art lessons, where he always gets a lollipop. High on sugar). I LOVE CRAYONS! I LOVE LOLLIPOPS! I LOVE UNICORNS!
Me:
