The Best Lesson Public School Teaches Parents: How to Let Go
Another of my boys starts school next week, taking that first step on a 13-year journey, and there are three of them now, away from my influence seven hours of every weekday, and I can feel the fear of it catching in the back of my throat. It happens every year, just...
How We Untangle the Tangle of Parenting
Today I had a song stuck in my head, one from Plumb’s CD Need You Now. The line from the song goes like this: “But I’ve never felt this tied up and helpless/and all that I know is you’re gone, how do I let go?” and when I’ve finished singing it, I have this from my...
Dear New Mama: You Are Exceptional, Even If You Don’t Feel Like It
Dear new mama, Here you are, sitting in the dark, waiting for your husband to get home and relieve you, wondering if you can really do this, because it’s only been three days and you’re so worn out you can barely think straight, and just today you found yourself...
Dear Anorexia: You Will Not Win.
I met you early in life. I was just a girl. Just a girl looking for life. Just a girl looking for perfect. Just the right kind of girl for you. You whispered your lies in my ear one night when a crack split right down the middle of our family. Make him love you, you...
How to Pursue Dreams When an Immovable Mountain Stands in the Way
Sometimes raising five children feels like a giant, immovable mountain. This morning my husband and I led the music for our beloved church after months of take-it-easy and watch-from-the-sidelines and attend-and-leave. This summer we have rested from ministry as we...
Dear Son: You Have Taught Us How to Overcome
You came into the world on a hot summer day, and you were easy and tiny and so very beautiful, snuggled tight in my arms. And it did not take you long to find my face with those eyes that I knew would remain large and brown. You snuggled into my chest, skin pressed...
Dear Mama: You Don’t Have to Get in the Pool. But Maybe You Can Try.
“Are you going to go swimming tonight, Mama?” he says in that little-boy voice. It’s the 5-year-old, who likes to play with her hair. Who loves to snuggle. Who thinks she’s the most beautiful woman in the world. All that doesn’t matter. She’ll still say no. “Not...
What Does Father’s Day Look Like to the Fatherless?
We all gathered on the same two acres where my sister and brother and I grew up, though the house we lived in for seven years no longer sits on the land. Another marks its place instead, wider, longer, newer. Fajita meat smoked on the island in the middle of the...
Do As I Do: The Only Parenting Truth Our Kids Really Understand
Children do not see in gray, only in black and white. Here I go complaining and criticizing and judging, and I have told them this is not the way, and, oh, it is so hard to live the way I desire my children to live, without this bend toward complaint and this critical...
Dear Society: Boys Can Cry, Too
Dear society, Let’s settle something once and for all: Boys are allowed to have feelings, too. I know you feel uncomfortable with a boy who cries. I know you cringe to see a boy walking sad. I know you can’t stand to see a man barely able to crawl from his bed for the...